First, y'all just have to know I'm coming at this from the perspective that as Americans, we are disgustingly rich. And yet we still over-consume, and teach our kids that more is better, and wonder why we're stressed out...
Disclaimer: I do not in any way claim to have it "all figured out". This will only be our fourth Christmas with kids, and I'm sure we have done many things wrong. So take this with a grain of salt and only apply what strikes your fancy :)
One major way I'm simplifying Christmas this year is by not having a tree. I'm sure I'll get some shade thrown my way for that. We live in a small, open concept home. While wonderful for gatherings, the openness leaves few corners into which to tuck a tree. We've somewhat recently acquired more seating (moving toward our goal of using our home as a safe refuge for all who enter, and making sure many people enter regularly; plus we're hosting Christmas this year!), which is great, but it has taken up all my options for where to place a tree. At this point, I would be shoving a big extra thing into an area I aim to keep as light and airy feeling as possible. So we will be placing an old Ikea tabletop tree on our coffee table and calling it a day. (In response to baby's question, the gifts will slide neatly under the coffee table, so no worries there) Oh, and we have tiny friends over regularly who will now not be able to destroy our tree because it is nonexistent.
I should also briefly tell you that we don't do Santa, and here's why: growing up, my parents always told me they would never lie to me. They didn't do Santa with us. Jake's family did - and still does - but when we became foster-to-adopt parents, we decided it was super important that traumatized kids know they could completely trust us. For that reason, we also don't do Elf on the Shelf. So take that as you will.
In case you were wondering, you will still be able to walk into our home and know it's Christmas. We have garland (inherited from my grandmother) hung over the kitchen sink, and strands of that same garland twisted into a minimal wreath. After Christmas last year we purchased some of those vintage-style colored light strands to go on the front porch. We will use our vintage-style white strands (also purchased after Christmas one year) to hang from the curtain rod in the living room. I'll probably put some of my favorite ornaments in a shallow decorative basket and use that as a centerpiece on our dining table. And we've got our stack of Christmas CDs - not to mention those newfangled wonders like Amazon music and Spotify - ready to roll.
However, every year, Jake and I realize we want to focus less and less on the materialism that seems to define Christmas in our culture. Last year baby got three gifts from us, plus his stocking. This year he's getting one gift from us. He's currently the only grandchild on both sides (but come April, he will no longer hold that title!), has two generous uncles who make good money, and is the only great grandchild on one side. Trust me when I say he will get plenty. I am looking forward to using our new Jesse Tree during Advent this year; I'm excited to begin a tradition that focuses more on the anticipation of Jesus's birth, than on the growing pile of wrapped gifts.
We do have a pretty fun stocking tradition: we each get $10 (plus a little extra for tax) and head to the local Dollar Tree. We spend $5 on each of the other people in our immediate family. So, I spend $5 on Jake and $5 on baby; Jake spends $5 on me and $5 on baby; and baby spends $5 each on me and Jake. So the total we spend on stockings is less than $35, it's so much fun, and everyone - regardless of their income - gets to pick out and purchase for everyone else.
Now on to those gift ideas I promised you! My very favorite tangible idea is a Fair Trade Friday subscription. The recipient gets cool gifts in every box, and each purchase supports artisans who are then able to continue making their goods rather than work in a dangerous factory or, even worse, fall victim to human trafficking. Probably the best option of all is to simply choose something from the Samaritan's Purse (or similar) catalog, and donate in honor of your loved ones. We plan to do this with our parents and siblings from now on.
Lastly, I'll mention a fun idea we had last year. Jake and I are fortunate enough to have a young family all around, so we go to 4 Christmases - one for each set of grandparents - in addition to my immediate family, his immediate family, and the 3 of us. So, for one of our Christmases, each household was to bring a favorite game - it didn't even have to be new! - wrapped and ready for Dirty Santa. When Dirty Santa was over, we then spent the time we formerly spent opening gifts by playing some of the games. At the end of the day, each household left with a new-to-them game to enjoy. So if you're looking for a way to focus less on gifts, but still get to enjoy opening something, give this a try.
Are these ideas too Scrooge-like for you? If so, how do you balance focusing on the true reason for the season, while still celebrating like everyone else? I'd love to hear your thoughts in the comments below!
