school's out for summa

not really, because we school year-round. But I personally will be taking a summer break from blogging; see you back here after Labor Day! And enjoy the rest of your summer :)

dressing stylishly on a budget

Please don't let that title fool you into thinking I'm a fashion expert, because I'm not. Far from it. I prefer classic, slightly retro (think 50s/60s/70s) looks. Today we are going to talk about how to dress for your style on any budget.

Implement a capsule wardrobe. They are all the rage on pinterest and the blogosphere, and for good reason. Not only does a capsule wardrobe help to define your style and cut down on decision fatigue, it also helps cut down on the laundry mountain. Typically, the fewer clothes you have, the more you'll feel free to spend on a particular item that you KNOW will fit, as opposed to spending the same amount on multiple pieces of cheap clothing that are only so-so.

Always buy the best quality you can afford. We will all go through seasons of life when money is tighter, and then other seasons when it's not so tight. In the not so tight seasons I've enjoyed the Stitch Fix service, as well as some of my favorite ethical brands - Brass and Everlane to name a few. These high quality staples have lasted long after my loose budget did, enhancing my wardrobe with high end finds.

Stick to the basics. Though your style may be different than mine, try to stick to clothing basics when purchasing. Add flair with your accessories; they're less expensive. Buying more classic pieces to mix and match in your own unique way means your closet won't look too dated. 1998 butterfly clips and bell bottom jeans, anyone?

Thrift stores. Man oh man do I love finding hidden gems at a thrift store. You can also go the slightly more expensive, yet more predictable route of consignment store shopping. And by all means, utilize them when you need to! But check thrift stores first. Go in with a general list, such as "jeans and a few neutral colored sweaters", and see what you can find. If you find too much, remember to narrow it down using the second tip - the best quality you can afford. If Goodwill has Wal-Mart jeans and Levi's for the same price, go for the Levi's. Be sure to try on the clothes before purchasing, and check well for holes or discoloration. Chances are, if an item at a thrift store still looks nearly new, it's likely going to hold up well for you too. Keep in mind that some flaws are easy fixes. I found a pair of Banana Republic shorts at my thrift store a few weeks ago, but on one side, the hem had come undone (so you could see about an inch of what should have been folded up on the inside). Knowing I own a needle, thread, and basic sewing skills, I purchased the shorts and fixed them myself. So easy, and now I own a $3 pair of nice, classic, high quality shorts that will last me for years to come.

Kids' clothes. I would be remiss if I didn't touch on how to dress your kids well on a budget. I prefer kidizen for baby's clothes, because here too I have a particular taste that is not typically found among hand-me-downs or small town thrift stores. I like for him to dress classic/slightly European, with a bit of hipster thrown in. Kidizen sellers tend to have high quality clothes their kids only wore a handful of times (more so than ThredUp, for example). It's also super user friendly. That's always my first stop when he needs clothes. Baby does happen to be very tall and very slim, so sometimes there's only one way to go when purchasing his long pants: H&M. I know it's fast fashion and not very ethical, and I'm totally up for suggestions! It's just the only place I know where I can find pants to fit him. Their hipster style means their pants fit slim anyway, plus they come with the elastic bands to further tighten them. So if your child has a certain fit that can't be found many places, by all means stick to what you know. Just fill in with less expensive options. And of course take advantage of the old standbys - hand me downs and gifts from grandparents.

I hope these ideas will help you realize it's very possible to dress stylishly even on a budget. For your capsule wardrobe, always buy the highest quality staples you can afford, and fill in with consignment and thrift stores when the budget is tighter. Do the same for your kids (and spouse, if you're allowed!).

Just curious: do you already have a capsule wardrobe? Are there any other tips you would add to dressing well for less?

Sunday suppers

I haven't been feeling super inspired to write lately, so I figured today I would just let you in on what's been consuming my thoughts/plans/decision making lately.

Let me harken back to several years ago, when I first stumbled upon my favorite book series. In the first book, "Madame Chic" and "Madame Bohemienne" each host at least one dinner party every week. I loved this idea, so for the last two or so years I have hosted a couple of different friends about once a month for a casual dinner party.

However, in my recent readings on Christian hospitality, I've been convicted that hosting French-style dinner parties is not the same as having a hospitable heart and, therefore, an open home. Jesus's example to us was much more broad and everyday. So...

A few weeks ago, we began what we've dubbed "Sunday suppers": since we don't have church on Sunday evenings, we are offering a meal to anyone who wants to come and enjoy some fellowship. And by anyone, we really mean anyone. We would love to have the sort of community with one another that you read about in the New Testament, but this meal isn't limited to Christians.

Jake and I have both been feeling a lack of deep, meaningful relationships lately. It seems there are so many relationships which are superficial, lacking the sisterhood/brotherhood bond we'd love to share. As introverts, it's pretty difficult for either of us to initiate specific relationships. What we do have, however, is our home. And food. And an enjoyment of sharing both with others.

My meal planning sessions include leftovers for when we make a lot of food on a Sunday but don't have a lot of visitors. My grocery list includes hopefully more than enough, because I've never cooked for a big crowd before. I've been on the lookout for more comfortable dining chairs to encourage people to linger at the table - and lo and behold, I found three gorgeous black cane back chairs at the Habitat ReStore the other day. There wasn't a fourth; however, there was a wooden, armed cane back chair placed near them. So I snatched those puppies up and brought them home to beg Jake to help me redo them :) In white, of course. With drop cloth covering the seat cushions.

So far, all the Sunday suppers have been small affairs. Which has been an enjoyable and non-threatening way to begin opening our home on a regular basis. We dream of this becoming big, and having a regular community entering our home on a weekly basis. Doesn't it feel like life is too segmented today? Everyone is so busy, it's like we've isolated ourselves from other people (in real life anyway). We want to bring back neighborliness and sharing everything we have with those around us.

What do you think - would you come to one of our Sunday suppers? (if you're truly interested, we have food enough to share every Sunday evening at 6 pm, no exceptions) Have you ever hosted others in your home regularly, maybe even for a meal? Share your thoughts and experiences with us!

do it all for the glory of God

Now that you've caught your breath and have gotten over being angry about my last post, let me simply remind Christians that all we do should be for God's glory, not our own.

Only the things we do for Him will be of eternal value. Every other task will pass away, and eventually be forgotten about. But not the ways we work for His kingdom.

Scrubbing toilets to hear someone say what a good toilet scrubber we are, or to pride ourselves on being the neighborhood's best toilet scrubber, is pointless. Who cares. But scrubbing our toilets for the sanitation of our home, and thereby keeping our family and those who enter our home healthy so they can learn about Jesus, meet Jesus, and then follow Jesus...now that is valuable.

In our quest for excellence in our home and lives, let us not become too focused on our own achievements or glory, but rather let us make our homes so we can point others to our God.

Everything else is just vanity.

all is vanity

This week might be little off my usual path, but bear with me. And read Ecclesiastes if you haven't lately.

I love beautiful things, I love creating an enjoyable atmosphere in my home and exercising some nearly lost arts such as formal dinnerware, etc. However, as a Christian, ultimately this is not my home. This life is just a blip on the timeline of eternity, and we are here for such a short time. Pretty things won't go with us after we die.

In light of this, is it even ok to work at creating a beautiful home and home life? Sure. As long as that's not your end goal. I create a pleasurable environment in my home so that we may then invite others in, and be a place of respite and renewal for them. If we are ever honored enough to be "home" to a homeless person for a period of time, I don't want to slack off on the homemaking front merely because he/she isn't "important"; I want him/her to fully relax and feel like an honored guest - because he/she would be. I work to create seating areas in my home for us, but primarily to provide plenty of comfy spots for tushies to rest while they get fed.

I don't believe the Bible includes hospitality as a suggestion for Christians; I believe it's a mandate. The Bible says to care for orphans and widows. How many of us have given a home to an orphan or taken care of yardwork or groceries for a widow? Seriously, think about it. Taking care of orphans and widows is not mentioned as a task for the deacons, or the hospitality committee, or people who are "gifted" in that area. It just says to take care of them.

The Bible is full of commands to care for "the least of these" - orphans, widows, aliens, fellow believers, anyone who is hungry or thirsty or naked. Commands. It's not optional. Anything other than serving God and caring for the least of these is all vanity.

So jump in and get involved. Donate to charities that directly care for orphans, widows, aliens, or the impoverished. Become a foster or adoptive parent. "Adopt" a widow in your community to begin to care for - regularly, not just once. Fight for your government to welcome refugees - sign petitions, call your representative, run for local office yourself. When you see someone hungry, give them food. The Bible doesn't even say to try to discern whether that person holding the sign is truly homeless or if they're just needing their next fix. What another person does is between them and God; as Aslan says in C.S. Lewis's The Silver Chair, "it's not your story". Christians are only commanded to care for the hungry.

Volunteer at a soup kitchen. Volunteer with or begin a grassroots effort for your community to house refugees. Do like a friend of mine is, and build a tiny house for an organization that rescues women from sex trafficking.

Social justice is not the world's cause. It was Jesus's, and by extension, should be the cause of His followers as well. If you're not involved, you're not following Jesus. Plain and simple. You can do all the Bible studies you want, but if your life doesn't impact another person's life for the glory of God, you might as well be twiddling your thumbs. Christians, let's step up and be who we are called to be: light and hope in a dark world. It's our mission; now let's accept it.

requiring excellence in what you allow into your home

Because I love the finer things - not necessarily expensive, but worthwhile and enjoyable - I have a fairly high standard regarding what I allow in my home. My way might not be the best, and I'm not trying to put anyone with differing opinions down. But if you want to elevate your home life and your children's childhood along with it, I've got some ideas for you.

Charlotte Mason had great guidelines regarding children's books. I believe we can translate that for our modern lives to television shows as well. She warned against "twaddle" - those things children might enjoy, but are doing nothing to help their mind or heart focus on greater things. For example, I don't think she would approve of books based on popular characters, such as Ninja Turtles books or Paw Patrol books. Those types of things may not be negative, but they're not exactly rich literature either. Likewise, any television show that has some sort of catchy jingle that gets stuck in your head would likely fall under the category of "twaddle".

So what types of books, music, television shows, and movies should we allow for our children? Glad you asked. Keep in mind I am not an expert. I'm merely a mom who wants to expose her son to excellence rather than settling for ordinary.

I prefer to listen to mostly classical music with baby. We definitely listen to other genres, as well, but overall we steer clear of "kid music" because we want him to rise to the bar we set, not remain stagnant and demand things at or below his developmental level.

On our weekly library trips, I allow him to choose one or two books that I will then let him read during our daily quiet times. Beyond that, I choose what he reads for school (lately it's been Beatrix Potter) and what we read for our read aloud time (most recently, Heidi). Think of classics and you'll probably be safe. He's also read the Madeleine books, for example.

I searched high and low to find a few television shows to allow for his leisure screen time. Little House on the Prarie, Andy Griffith, Roy Rogers, and the like are mostly found on Amazon Prime for free or little cost. He genuinely enjoys these shows - and I don't have the Wonder Pets theme song stuck in my head until kingdom come. We occasionally watch documentaries for history or science lessons. He loves learning about inventors! You never know what could spark their interest if you never expose them to anything other than animation.

Similarly, with movies, I prefer to show him classics. Sometimes this means 90s movies Jake and I grew up loving, or sometimes it's older movies, or remakes of older movies. Honestly I just find that most movies today that are directed toward kids contain subjects we just aren't comfortable exposing him to yet.

Beyond the general Charlotte Mason guideline, there's a biblical one I haven't mentioned but which does hold more weight for Christians: that of thinking on only things which are good, true, excellent, or praiseworthy. Taken to the extreme, this could mean never exposing our children to fiction. I don't take it this far...but I can see why it might be a good idea. For myself, I tend to be stricter about this point. However, it's good to compare the media our children are exposed to, to this standard. Are cartoons on Nick Jr. good, true, excellent, or praiseworthy? They might be not bad but they're also not winning any Academy Awards. On the flip side, are all award-winning shows true, or praiseworthy? Remember the youth pastor's standby: Would you watch/read/listen to this if Jesus were in the room with you? Because He is.

I hope I haven't come across too harshly. I intended only to share ideas for elevating your children's media intake. If you have any guidelines you follow, please share them in the comments below. Have you given much thought to what your kids watch/read/listen to? As parents, is this something we should be concerned with? I'd love to hear your thoughts!

what I've been reading lately

I think that periodically I'll tell you about what I've read lately, especially if what I've been reading is convicting or causes me to change the way I do things. I've read a lot of books like that lately, so I figured it was time to share them.

It all started when I read Secret Thoughts of an Unlikely Convert. It's been in my nightstand for ages, and as I have a goal to read all the books I own, I finally got to it. And boy, do I wish I had earlier. The author has an incredible story, first of all, but what hit me was her willingness to open her home to others. This is only a small part of her writing, not at all the primary focus, but I was so convicted by this that I began praying earnestly for God to show us how He wants us to use our home. And He has definitely made that clear to us!

There were a several books referenced in the above-mentioned book, so I ordered a couple that I had actually had on my amazon wishlist. The first was Making Room: Recovering Hospitality as a Christian Tradition. This was a hard read, I won't lie. I had to read it when I could completely focus on the book. It goes through a history of hospitality in the early church, how that particular type of hospitality fell out of use, and what we can do (and why) to pick it up again. Basically, hospitality is so much more than "entertaining" guests. It's actually not that at all. It's opening your home to any and all who need it, since our homes are not ours but God's. He has given us everything we have to be used to further His kingdom. Holing up in our homes and hosting dinner parties is NOT biblical hospitality; feeding, clothing, and housing the poor is. Fostering deeper relationships between church members is. And using everything we have for His work is, most definitely, biblical hospitality.

The second book I ordered was The Lifegiving Home. I have to admit, once I started reading this, I was slightly disappointed that its focus seems to be more on creating home for your family, as opposed to sharing home with others. BUT it's good for me to read about that, too, to ensure I don't open my home to others while neglecting the needs of my family. I'm not quite through with this one, but it is a good read!

Another book I heard about (from one of the above books; I just followed a rabbit trail basically when deciding what to read next on the subject) was Open Heart, Open Home (I've linked an updated version of the one I got from the library). I love this book! She just briefly mentions - as though she assumes we must already know - that hospitality is not optional for Christians; it's mandated. We are to open our homes, and help those less fortunate, period. She doesn't sugarcoat Christianity the way it seems many modern authors do. She talks in detail about allowing the Holy Spirit to work in and through us. And she encourages us that perfection need not play a role in hospitality; in fact, others feel more at ease when they see that our homes and our lives are not perfect! I'm not even halfway through this book and already loving it.

I can't leave off without mentioning the audiobook we just finished listening to, Love Does. The author pretty much just says "yes!" to most opportunities presented to him...and as a result, has accomplished some pretty amazing things for the kingdom of God and for our world.

So, what stood out to me so much about these books? And what have I done as a result of reading them? Glad you asked. Basically, God has made a few things clear to us: generally speaking, He wants us to open our home. I don't know what specifically that will look like, but it's like He's told us, "be ready! And be willing to use everything I've given you for the work I have planned for you."

In addition, He has shown us a specific way He wants us to use our home and resources, but I'll keep that under wraps. I will share that while we were planning to implement this at the end of the summer, God very recently showed me that since I already know what He wants me to do, I just need to do it! So we are :)

This is not to be something that brings us any recognition whatsoever, but it is to be done for God's glory and His greater purpose. Why am I even bringing it up? Because I'm still kind of shocked that a few books and prayers and searching Scripture has led to such a specific revelation.

What has the Holy Spirit been laying on your heart lately? And read any good books?